Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Today I Saved A Life. True Story.

I am cooler than Wonder Woman, Elastagirl, and Hermione Granger all put together. Said life saving did not involve needles or siphoning of blood from my system. I am far cooler than that. I am the sort of life saving machine who likes to just throw herself into the problem, as it were. So here's what happened:

Amazon Woman (that's me *grin*) running faster than a speeding bullet she races down the road with her favorite running companion (Latin music) but look, what be in yonder distance? In a blue sports car there be a young mother about to dash into traffic, seemingly oblivious to her imminent T-boning. Without a moments thought Amazon Woman (remember how cool she is *wink*) does the only thing she can to stop blue sports car girl. Amazon Woman dashes forward and slams herself into the side of the blue sports car chariot to stop the young mother from being crushed to oblivion. Never mind the bruised knees that Amazon Woman has, or the therapy she may have to go through before ever running again; it was all for a good cause. Those warm fuzzy feelings (of utter terror and shock) completely make up for everything, because helping moronic drivers not die is Amazon Woman's favorite thing. Amazon Woman sighs as she limps off towards her humble abode, "All in a days run, all in a days run."

Moral of said story: Just because Darwin didn't get you this time blue sports car girl, doesn't mean he won't later. Learn to drive or prepare to have your genes removed from the human gene pool.


  1. Oh my, I am so glad you didn't try to stop her by running in front of the car! Did she have children in the car with her? So did the woman say anything to you after this happened? You are amazing Amazon Woman!!!

  2. Sed sai, teach me your righteous ways...so that I can save my fellow American's lives as well.

    I answer to you, master. Haha